Breaking up hurts, but it really hurts when you can’t let go of your ex. I’ve experienced this over and over again. There’s a pain in your heart, a hole in your life, and a hope that you will get back together. That hope makes it hurt when you see your ex having fun without you and getting on with their life. And that keeps your life at a standstill where everything hinges on your ex and how they are making you feel. If your ex is getting on with their life and you want to get on with yours, following are some affirmations to help you let go of your ex and start moving forward.
1. If It Is Meant To Be It Will Be
Sometimes people get back together after breaking up. Most of the time they don’t, though.
A breakup is a good sign that something is not working between the two of you at this time. There’s something that you two can’t agree on or live within a relationship, and that’s why it’s better to go your separate ways then to live in a state of make-believe or suffering.
Maybe down the road, the issues that are keeping you apart now will disappear. Maybe one of you will change. Maybe both of you will change. And, if you are meant to be, you will find your way back to each other and get into a successful relationship.
By using the affirmation, ‘If it is meant to be it will be’, you can let go of the desperate need to get back together right now. You can relax knowing that if you truly are meant to be, you will get back together when you are supposed to and it will all work out.
2. My Focus Is On My Personal Development
When you focus on your ex and getting them back, the struggle and pain become intense. And that’s when it becomes almost impossible to let go of your ex. All you can think about is having them, so letting them go isn’t even an option.
You need to shift your focus off your ex and on to something else if you want to relieve the pain. And the best thing you can shift your focus towards is YOU!
Where can you start? The fact is that you contributed to the breakup in some way. You probably know what you did, but if you don’t, here are some things to think about.
- Were you too needy in your relationship?
- Did you talk poorly to your partner?
- Did you not talk enough?
- Were you insecure?
- Did you try to change your partner?
- Did you pretend to be someone you were not?
- Were you not honest in the relationship?
Sometimes we don’t see the little ways that we allowed our relationship to deteriorate. But think about honesty, trust, communication, respect, value, and support when you look at your contribution to the breakup and you will likely find your contribution.
When you do, start working on it. For example, if you find that you let yourself get walked on in the relationship, and your partner lost respect for you because of it, then you will want to work on your confidence and self-importance.
You may find that you start working on yourself with the notion of getting your ex back. But, as you go along, and your focus goes more towards you than your ex, you may realize that it is time to let your ex go and move on with your life.
3. My Relationship Taught/Gave Me Something
Your relationship had meaning, whether it was a healthy or unhealthy relationship.
It taught you something about yourself or what you want in your life.
It helped you get through something, learn something, or create something.
It was there during a time in your life when you really needed it.
It gave you something you really needed.
When you acknowledge that your relationship taught or gave you something, then you can start to see in it in the past. You can see what it did for you and, maybe, even realize why it was only meant to be in your life for a short period of time.
For instance, in one of my past relationships, my boyfriend wanted to get a dog. I didn’t want a dog at all! I was young and I thought it was too much responsibility. He insisted. We ended up getting a Miniature Pinscher who was the runt of the litter. We named him Goliath. We broke up 10 months later, but I kept Goliath. That was over 14 years ago, and I still have Goliath. He has taught me so much about love, myself, and being tough when you need to be. I love that little guy so much, and I know that one of the reasons that relationship occurred to bring him into my life.
It makes it much easier to let go of your ex when you see what they did for you and your life, and accept that they contributed what they needed to contribute to your life.
4. My Life Can Be Amazing Whether I’m Single Or Taken
Sometimes it’s hard to let go of your ex because you feel like being single sucks. But that’s just a perception, not an absolute truth. There are plenty of people who are single and happy. You can be one of them.
This affirmation reminds you that you can have a happy and rewarding life, whether you are single or taken. It really boils down to your thoughts, actions, and habits.
If you are thinking of positive thoughts, doing good things for yourself, and engaging in positive habits for your health and happiness, then life can be really rewarding no matter what your relationship status is.
5. There Is Someone Better Out There For Me
If you really want to let go of your ex, use this affirmation as often as you can.
It’s the truth, even if you don’t realize it yet.
There is someone out there who will suit you better, treat you better, love you more, annoy you less, or make you happier. I can guarantee that.
And, when you find them, you are going to know a new level of relationship happiness that you have not experienced yet.
For me, I learned something from each relationship and made sure to find someone who didn’t have the same traits as the other people I’ve dated.
For instance, I dated someone who did drugs and quickly learned that I didn’t want to date anyone who did drugs ever again. So, in the future, I avoided anyone who did drugs and my relationships had less lying and more trust.
I know that’s an extreme example, but as you learn what you will and will not accept on all levels, your relationships become better and better as you stop allowing people with traits you don’t want into your life.
Yes, there is someone better out there for you. Let go of your ex so that you can keep your eyes open and spot them when they show up.
Tip: Take this free masterclass on conscious uncoupling with Katherine Woodward Thomas. It will help you move on from a relationship both emotionally and physically.